.SOMETIMES RAW.

“He sweeps her hair back from her ears; he swings her above his head. he says she is his émerveillement. He says he will never leave her, not in a million years.”  ― Anthony Doerr, All the Light We Cannot See

This was a book I picked up because it simply popped up in any of my book recommendation newsletters, online, in bookstores and friends recommended it. I needed to know what all the hype is about – with books I do make an exception. My first thought was that the book is really thick – to let you know from the start, “The light we cannot see” comes in 530 pages. Usually, if I start a book like that I know out of experience that there will be a plethora of details, many people interact and get involved so it is not a easy breezy read. However, I started the book and was done with it in no-time. The chapters are very short and it makes you interested enough to keep reading. Besides that, it is a unique story and very beautifully written. 

The book starts out by introducing the two main characters; a blind French girl – Marie Laure and Werner who is a radio expert in the German army who cannot leave the city when WW II starts and the Allies begin shelling Saint-Malo; a French city. Marie Laure and Werner are both very young in the beginning of the story and they author jumps back and forth between those two’s perspectives on the war and their life. Here you really have to focus and pay attention, otherwise you loose track of the story. It is not a war novel so to speak but a plot brings both characters together which is also described by Doerr in very rich, precise and elegant language.  

I give ever book the chance of fifty pages to get me hooked. If this does not happen I put it down usually. With “The light we cannot see” it took me exactly forty pages to figure everything out and then I could not stop reading. So honestly, it did not hit me right away. You wonder about the title of the book? This is what Anthony Doerr explained in an interview:

“The title is a reference first and foremost to all the light we literally cannot see: that is, the wavelengths of the electromagnetic spectrum that are beyond the ability of human eyes to detect (radio waves, of course, being the most relevant). It’s also a metaphorical suggestion that there are countless invisible stories still buried within World War II — that stories of ordinary children, for example, are a kind of light we do not typically see. Ultimately, the title is intended as a suggestion that we spend too much time focused on only a small slice of the spectrum of possibility.” 

Overall, I would recommend this book. It has a lot of details as I expected and I think that some characters were not really necessary but simply filled pages. WW II was just insane and you get some good ideas on how these people must have felt during the war. This book will make you feel emotional at points and you will probably see for yourself that there is a lot of light under the surface of history that simply has not been revealed. 

Thank you for reading. Enjoy this book if you read it and share your thoughts. 

“Parenting isn’t a practice. It’s a learning experience.”

Do you have the feeling sometimes that you are doing this parenting thing all wrong? I talked to parents and some said  they don’t know what they are doing either which makes me feel instantly better. Sometimes however I lay awake in bed and think it all over and wonder if I am doing a good job with my son. All the stuff I am preaching here – I mean, is it all enough? Then there are other days when I think that I have it all figured out. I am doing it and I am doing a great job! This happens here and there. My son is almost two years old now – and as he is learning to be a two year old I am learning to be a mom of a two year old. And yes, everybody on the playground keeps on telling me about the “Terrible Two’s!” And how difficult this will be… and I have to deal with so much from now on especially in stores. Well, we are both learning. He is my first child so I am experiencing all these things together with him and I believe it is all a learning process. 

Parenting is an awesome fascinating thing. My husband and I made this little munchkin and I feel in awe that we created him and he has so many qualities from both of us. Sometimes I worry because he has a quick temper at points – as I have. Or that he has too many emotions and it seems he is thinking and analyzing everything all the time. But this is what it is all about. We see ourselves in the children we raise. We learn from them and maybe become a better person ourselves. 

It is so weird because I feel that I was meant to be a parent my entire life. I never wanted to have kids but this is definitely my thing. Whenever I look back to my life before it feels that it was okay but something was missing all along. These past two years with my son were the best time of my life. They felt like a million bucks but they are gone in just an instant too. Isn’t it just amazing to grow these tiny humans, form them, teach them and be in this position to call them “yours”? 

Not every day is happy sunshine and I have to admit that some days really suck. Sometimes my son gets up on the wrong foot – as we all do at points. These little guys have bad days too. So I am aware of it. Every day is unique.  You think you have it all down? Well, guess what? Tomorrow life throws you another curveball. This is just how it is. I enjoy the wonderful days – they are magic. And I try to remember them when times get rough. These magical days are what keeps me going; these special days when I curl up with my son on the couch and we watch Disney Channel at night covered up with a blanket before he goes to bed. Or being all snuggled while reading. When he kisses me good night and tells me he loves me makes my heart melt no matter how bad the day was.  I guess we have to have these hard tough days sometimes to get us back to the magic. So we sort of don’t kill them. 😉 We simply keep learning and keep it all going – and we stumble and get back up. Day in and day out. All we can do is adjust our little sails and continue. And what else do our kids teach us? That we are all here for the first time and try to figure it all out. Exactly like them. And if we just do the things we love that everything will be just a-okay in the end. 

Mmmmhhhmmmmm….. the smell of freshly baked bread! Isn’t it awesome? I am sick of the bread that I get to buy here in the store. It tastes like rubber, smells weird and I get bloated when eating it. I made my own bread and rolls a couple of times already and I will share my recipe here so you can try it if you like. My bread is let’s say “healthier” and more satisfying and the most important thing is you know exactly what is in it. NO chemicals added. Le’t dive right in. 

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The same you can do as an entire loaf of bread btw. You just knead the dough, same ingredients as above and put in Bread Loaf Pan. Cover with seeds as you prefer. For the bread bake on 475 Fahrenheit (250 Celsius) for  20 minutes. Then on 392 Fahrenheit (200 Celsius) for approximately 40 minutes. Done! 

Enjoy with butter, homemade jam and a glass of red wine.