You will LOVE having another kid! It’s the best. I mean look at that little face. Your son would have a sibling. Come on, you are not too old. You are what? Like 35? How could you say no to those chubby cheeks? Honestly, I don’t even…
“I’LL CHECK THAT OUT!” I’m not going to check that out. (e.g. super expensive makeup). Yes, I’m sure you like it, and I’m sure you recommended it to me in good faith. To you, the 80 uninterrupted hours you spent gushing over its merits was…
Dear reader: I have been stuck at home with a horrible cold for the last couple of days but am on the road to recovery. Yay! I have been thinking quite a lot these days (besides sleeping, this was the only thing I was really…
Power to understand men Ability to fly (away sometimes) Ability to make some people disappear Ability to turn my faults invisible Ability to understand why certain things are so fucking expensive (like a new toilet seat! Just the damn seat) Ability to grow ten times…
Ladies, are you ready for your man to commit to you with the same diligence and enthusiasm he pours into his War Movies binge-watching? Then optimize your relationship this Valentine’s Day with this date guide. This list has something for everybody—long-term lovers, a new fling,…
*But why you may ask? Here are some reasons: Password must contain both uppercase and lowercase characters. Password must have eight to twelve characters. Too many characters detected. Password cannot contain trademarked characters—e.g., Garfield, The Smurfs. Password cannot contain characters that are dangerously close to…
As you may know, I have an 11 year-old son. Yikes! Preteen material! I think I am doing a great job raising him but sometimes I worry about losing the connection with my funny, vulnerable little boy as he gets older. But then, as time…
Move across the country and hope the Sadness won’t find you, won’t follow you like a stray dog from country to country. Hope the Sadness isn’t just a dog on a leash, shadowing you always. Hope the Sadness can’t be as exaggerated as you are,…
Dear Customer, Thank you for buying a box of Kellogg’s Cereal. We value you as a customer. Unfortunately during the time of manufacture, our computers were down. Since it is our goal to attract as many customers as possible, we rely heavily on the layout…
“Minimum of 2 years of experience in a similar role” Ideally, you will have at least 45 years of experience in this exact role. Though, we do want you to be fresh, hip, and innovative. So maybe you can be, like, a clone of Frank,…
