.SOMETIMES RAW.

Hello and Happy Friday!

This week was crazy. Running around, doctor appointments and such, schedules and more appointments and now I sit in the kitchen, write and breathe. Everything is okay. I had a great evening so far watching a movie at SEHES Haus (Paulette) which was so sweet and funny. On the other hand, my son had a pretty bad day today. You know when you wake up in the morning and have a bad start or are in a bad mood and it somehow sticks with you throughout the day? That kind of day. Nothing was okay and was good enough in his eyes. He cried a lot and screamed. Days like this just suck, but hey what can we do. Tomorrow will be better, right? This is what I have been up to during this week. Have a great weekend. Enjoy!

Reading: I finished Albert Camus’s The Sea Close by and I enjoyed it. I also re-read The Essential Ginsberg and I did purchase this book because of the section ‘letters’ (especially the ones to Neil Cassidy) and ‘journals’. Great book by one of my favorite authors. ‘What happened Miss Simone‘ is a book I can pick out from Blogging for Books to review. Sounds awesome. Have you heard about ‘Wreck and Order’ by Hannah Tennant? It has gotten some great reviews so far. 

Writing: I did not work too much on my book these days but I will change that. I did started many drafts for the blog however. I also wrote a lot in my little moleskin journal this week while waiting at doctor offices and whatnot. 

Watching: It seems that everybody in this world is watching the show ‘Love’, right? My husband and I also jumped on the bandwagon and finished the the first ten episodes this week. It was fun and entertaining I have to admit. Even though it took me a while to get into it I recommend it. 

We started ‘A Young Doctor’s Notebook‘ and it is funny and really well done. I guess we stick to this show for a while. I mean, Jon Hamm and David Radcliffe – hello? AMAZING! On my to-watch-list is the documentary about Nina Simone ‘What happened Miss Simone’. Check out the trailer here. Goosebump-material for sure. I have seen Malala Yousafzai at the United Nations and listened to her speeches several times. However, I never read her book.  I want to watch the documentary ‘He Named Me Malala’ for sure! I also watched ‘The Name of the Rose’ which blew me away. My husband could not believe that I have never seen it. Well, well, well…. 

Thinking about: Death lately. I was sad to hear that Umberto Eco (The Name of the Rose) passed away on February 19th.  I read The Mysterious Flame of Queen Loana a long time ago and remember that I loved it and always meant to read more by  him. As anybody who loves to read and reads a lot knows – too many good books, not enough time. Harper Lee “To Kill a Mockingbird” also died on February 19th. 

“Compassionate, dramatic, and deeply moving, To Kill A Mockingbird takes readers to the roots of human behavior – to innocence and experience, kindness and cruelty, love and hatred, humor and pathos.”

I was sad to hear about the passing of Peter Lustig on February 23rd. He was a German television presenter and author and well known for his children-TV show ‘Löwenzahn’. I grew up watching his show every week; mostly on Sunday. This is an excerpt of his last recorded show. ‘Abschalten’, as he used to say. 

Discovering: I recently found out about LitLounge.TV which is a great website stuffed with exciting and interesting interviews and authors. I loved to listen to Wolf-Dieter Storl so far! He is amazing! The ‘Coburger Literaturtage’ are around the corner, too. I hope I am here in April to listen to and meet some great writers and attend some readings. I am especially excited that Martin Walser (his latest book “Ein sterbender Mann”) will read from this book in April! He is almost 90 years old!  

Have you visited Denn’s Biomarkt at the Callenberger Strasse 16a in Coburg yet? The store opened in November 2015 and is an awesome shopping experience for anybody – especially if you are into fresh organic food. Denn’s offers a broad variety of products. From organic produce, to tofu, gluten-free product, lactose-free products to raw chocolate you will find it all. I also love the certified natural cosmetic section with brands like Dr. Hauschka and many more. And they offer sulfite-free wine. Say whaaaaat? Yep! And it tastes amazing. 

Here are some of my recent purchases at Denn’s the other day. Yum! 

Some other things that I found: 

Vegetables/Fruit:

brussel sprouts (and I made an awesome quiche with those. Recipe will follow soonish!)

Fresh Kurkuma (for Kurkuma Latte – husband is officially addicted to it!) 

organic lemon 

Dairy Aisle:

different cheeses (Wasabi cheese, raw milk cheese, a cheese with flowers in it)

Smoked tofu (the best one I found so far!) 

Bread, Snacks and Dessert:

Sea-salt dark raw chocolate (every bar has a little love-note inside! Sweet idea)

Whole wheat sunflower bread, cheese bread and pretzels 

At Denn’s you will also find a small selection of cook – and natural living books as well as fair-trade clothing.  

Denn’s is a bit like Trader Joe’s in the United States – or Whole Foods. And we all know Trader Joe’s, right? 

Check out more about Denn’s on their website.  The store is open Monday-Saturday from 8 am to 8 pm. Do try a cup of coffee and a slice of chocolate cake when you are done shopping. Both are so yummy! 

Have you been at a Denn’s Biomarkt yet? Did you like it? What did you buy? I would love to hear.

Well you’re in your little room and you’re working on something good,
but if it’s really good,
you’re gonna need a bigger room.
And once you’re in the bigger room
you might not know what to do,
you might have to think of
how you got started
sittin’ in your little room.  

-The White Stripes

My husband told me this morning that he missed my post on my website last night. Yep, I was tired and exhausted and went to bed at 9 pm. Now I am sitting in my brother’s room at my parent’s house and stare out the window. Writing daily feels good, I love it because it makes me feel good. These days however, I have some type of writer’s block and even though I have so many good topics in my head and drafts already written, it seems that my mind is blurry and tired. And usually when this happens, this song pops up in my head and while humming it almost silently and want to write again. Weird, I know. Writing daily for me feels real, good and successful in a way. I love to gather new stories but sometimes it is all so blurry. Slowly I found myself obsessing over post popularity, comments, page-views, clicks, likes and whatnot. It felt to me in a way that I am treating blogging (after almost one year) more like a type of business than what this all initially was supposed to be – my free public place of expression. I felt myself floating in a sea of memories, thoughts and ideas but it all was weird. My words felt forced. 

My little routine of blogging daily began to annoy me and I thought about doing it less and less. It was some weird shift and I felt that I write more for others than for myself. After much thought and talks with my husband I did realize again that all this is not about page-likes on Facebook. I want this blog to remain my little place of honesty, creativity and joy – nothing more, nothing less. I am proud of what I have accomplished over almost one year, especially all the reviews I have written. Initially, this blog was supposed to be book reviews only which I then decided does not work for me. I want a broader variety of things and topics and I need to move towards exploring more constantly. I want to experiment more with new subjects. I want to add photography for example. Anything we put our minds to we can do I believe. 

Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
— Howard Thurman

The good thing is, there are no rules about blogging. I can write daily, weekly, whenever I feel like it and it is okay. I can add my own images or images from the web (of course giving credit to the owner) but it is all okay too. Or I can start my novel here. No limitations. I do realize that there will always be people who like what I do and people who don’t, and it’s okay. People who read my blog daily, and people who don’t. Whatever I want this place to be – I can change it. I shift my thoughts away from this obsession over blog-followers and such and focus more on what’s in my heart and my creative vision. There is a lot of growth coming up in the near future, as a family and of course personally and I believe that a shift in direction is a natural consequence. I had a conversation with my husband the other day and I asked him if he listens more to his head or to his gut when it comes to making decisions. He says, “To both!” My gut has a way to steer me int he right direction and my gut says to make my little voice heard and connect again simply because I have so much to say (I am a woman, hah!) 

So, I go back to the place where I feel most at home. With my words and thoughts. I feel how I connect again with myself and this true passion.  And I begin to write.