.SOMETIMES RAW.

Hello!

Today I will share how I meditate, how I found out about it and a little overall information about Yoga. I have been practicing Yoga for about seven years; however, not consistently. I still signed up for  classes at Mang’Oh Yoga in New York when I was eight months pregnant – this is how amazing and good I felt. If you live around in Midtown Manhattan or a searching for a great Yoga studio, take a class at  Mang’Oh Yoga! At the studio I highly recommend “Vinyasa Flow” with Chintamani Kansas. I followed her schedule at Mang’Oh and took as many classes with her as possible, just because she is an awesome teacher! So awesome, that I got out of bed on a Sunday morning to join her 8.45am class of Power Yoga, followed by a Stretch/Meditation. This was the first time I got introduced to meditation. I read a lot about it but the thought of sitting still for a period of time made me uncomfortable. I was a bit worried to join my first class but I finally signed up and I have practiced mediation ever since. Sometimes more, sometimes less but I do make some time and room for it at least before I go to bed every night. Tonight I was able to enjoy the mediation at the SEHES Haus in Rödental/Germany. I used to practice guided meditation with Martina Meissner every Wednesday at 6pm. If you ever get the chance, try it. It is special every single time. <3

What is meditation? If I meditate anytime during the day, I sit on a yoga mat in a quiet, decluttered room by myself. If you feel more comfortable you can sit on a pillow. Any position is fine as long as you are comfortable. My legs are crossed in front of me, hands resting easily on my knees, closed eyes and focus on my breathing while relaxing my body. You should not control your breath. Instead just observe it! That is it! Sounds simple, right? Well, there is so much more to it.

Meditation has definitely nothing to do with fantasizing or daydreaming.  One of the main goal of mediation is to rest the mind and to achieve a state of consciousness that is different from being awake. Do you really know yourself? You can even find out who you are and learn self-control and so many other things. I love how clean, relaxed and focused my mind is after meditation. You are not sleeping; (well, sometimes it comes close to that stage with me ha!) you are fully alert and awake. When I first practiced, sitting still was the least of my problems. I sat down, closed my eyes and then all these thoughts popped up and did not stop. It was so weird and felt like I had a constant conversation with myself. You know this time at night when you cannot sleep and are turning and tossing in bed and so many thoughts and ideas bother you! We all do. Maybe, except men! 😉 The thoughts might stop or calm down if you meditate.

The key of mediation is to silence and still the mind so you are no longer distracted by anything. At this point you can deepen your mediation. It is amazing what the mind is capable of. Before I tried mediation I simply focused on everything external . Trying to get to know others was more important to me. But what we should really do is to look within us and see what we find and no longer remain strangers to ourselves. Meditation is a commitment you have with yourself. You do want to practice with the goal to get to know yourself but also to be calm and as happy and peaceful as possible.

Many thoughts will come and go when you start practicing. Let them! It gets better with a lot of practice. Many thoughts make you realize how restless the mind can be. It is important to have patience when you practice. I am not the most patient person but it has gotten better over time. I took my time and practiced whenever I thought it felt right. No rush, no stress and no pushing myself to anything. There were many others in my mediation classes who saw this and that and experienced great things and all I did was thinking about pretzels with butter for one hour. I focused on my goal of becoming better at this and it did work out over time. Society teaches us to go faster, bigger and better constantly. All this causes stress and it is very important to find a balance in life. It works for me with meditation and yoga.

I would love to hear your thoughts or any tips you want to share. Comment below.

On my bucket list is still the wish of going on a yoga/meditation retreat. Preferable Mexico or Italy. I also share a  book recommendation on Meditation. Find it here. 

Sometimes, I listen to this meditation music for one hour and I love it. But usually, I prefer complete silence to meditate.

Thank you for reading my blog. 

Hello!

I literally did not know what to write and talk about tonight. Call it writers-block, or simply that I am here in Germany and don’t want to sit somewhere and type along alone while my beloved family sits somewhere else and I could rather spend time with them. I am at my home-base here and now. I love it so much. We celebrated “Nikolaus” today with my son and my father dressed up 🙂

This evening we watched my favorite crime series – TATORT. It is so great to be with my parents. There are a lot of emotions involved and I am just happy to be back. This will be a post I meant to write for a long time; however, it seems right to do so now.  My siblings might have the same opinion here or maybe not. I just want to write this post based on my experiences only. When I grew up, my father was at work usually until 6-7 pm so as it mostly is, the mothers are at home taking care of the kids. And so did my mom and she did a great job. I will write a separate post on my dad and why it is awesome to have a father like him.

Growing up, I was so happy to have a mom just the was she is. How she made breakfast for me in the morning before I went to school. The bread (mostly homemade) with cheese and some cut-up veggies (mostly apples or paprika) and of course the water bottle filled with water in the summer and  hot tea that kept my hands warm while waiting for the bus or train in the winter. Some people cannot understand or would not know what is so great about that but it is special to me. The little things, you know. I have so many great memories of my mom and how she dealt with me while I was a kid. The way she introduced me to the local public library or when she took me shopping to this big supermarket in Coburg. How she took care of me when I was sick and needed a hot tea, medicine or just some hugs to feel better. Or help with homework (one bag of sugar are 1000 g which is 1 kg!) and learning about avalanches and biology. She was there for me – she helped me out, she clarified and explained. There are just so many vivid memories of moments in my childhood spent with my mom that I could go on and on. I remember how the coffee smelled when we used to go camping in summer and how she fixed breakfast for all of us. How she made every holiday special by decorating and giving me this warm feeling that I am at home and loved. (well, she still does!) I also do remember the times when I did disappoint her. When I made her feel sad, when she cried because of me and she still loved me unconditionally throughout my bad behavior. Most memories are happy memories however. There were many times  in my puberty when I though I never want to be like my mother or like my parents. And that I will do everything differently when I grow up.

And now? Since I am grown-up and have a child of my own, how did things change? Well, I find myself copying my mom a lot which is great and this works for me. I am appreciating the little things and love to cook and broaden my horizon by reading, learning and studying. I am not my mom but I think that a lot she does makes total sense to me and is amazing. I love that she is open to learn and explore so much. I am looking up to her as a mother and more like a friend and love to be around her. I understand more clearly now why she made certain choices in her life as well and why family is so important. Also not giving up right away is important,  patience and to see beauty in the little things at all times.

When Tatort was finished I took my computer and went to the kitchen (my office at home)  to think about something good to write about. I watched some videos and researched some things online and my mom came in. She just wanted to get a glass of water, prepare her breakfast and say good night. She also said that she really missed me while I was gone for the past five months. That she loves me and loved talking to me in person and seeing my son when she came back from work. Then, out of a sudden it became all clear.  I knew what I will write about tonight. Her!

Below is the link to the Love Theme of my mom and I’s favorite move “Bridges of Madison Country” if you would like to see. I love you so much Mama! I could not be more proud to be your daughter and to have so many good qualities because of you.

Thank you for reading my blog. 

Hey Hey!

What can you see in this picture? Sixt Car Rental and a cheese pretzel. My crazy life lead us this time to….. GERMANY! We are back home in Coburg for anybody who wants to catch up. On a very short notice my husband found this cheap flight for my son and I to Frankfurt and we left the United States all together; however, in different directions. My husband’s flight was back to Congo but we took of at the exact same time. This worked out pretty well and I wasn’t alone with two suitcases. Who I was alone with after was my son! We had to deal with an eight hour flight to Germany but it was a piece of cake. With us flying so much, and him having his own seat now and me having GRAVOL for him it is all a-okay. 🙂 The best part about this trip was that I did not tell anybody about it! Not even my brother, and he usually always knows. We rented a car with SIXT at the airport and I drove home to my parent’s place. Parked, got out of the car and rang the doorbell. Priceless. You should have seen my mom’s face. 😀

Loving: Spending time with my family and friends. Eating healthy food, pretzels, go to the Christmas Market and drink Mead and Glühwein with mon amie Sylvie, meet more friends, go to my favorite bookstore “Riemann” , having great talks and food with my friend Judith at the “Sonderbar” in Coburg, going to the Therme Rodach, which is a hot spring and men and women are actually able to enjoy the Sauna together – Meeerica take an example here! Actually, I don’t even know of any Sauna’s in Germany where men and women are separated like in the United States. Food for thought I hope!

Reading:  I recently finished “Everything I Never Told you” by Celeste Ng and loved it. I will write a review soon. I also read “The Healthy Mind Cookbook” by Rebecca Katz which I reviewed for BloggingforBooks here. On the plane I started “The Heart” by Maylis de Keragal. This book I will review for BookBrowse. I enjoy it so far. On my “to-read” list is “My name is Mahtob” by Mahtob Mahmoody.  I bet you all remember this movie: 

I am really looking forward to this book, written by the daughter! Stay tuned for a review for BookLookBloggers.

Watching: Do you want to laugh and be a bit sad and then laugh some more? Watch “Inside Out”. This Pixar Movie is amazing. Did you ever want to know what goes on in people’s minds? 🙂 Here is the trailer if you would like to see.

Missing: My husband. We have spent so much time together but now that I am without him I miss him dearly. So weird but he makes me truly happy. All this time in Canada just flew by like everything else in my life seems to fly by. Is there a “slow-down” button somewhere? I miss our little routine when waking up in the morning. The breakfasts together and good conversations. And even if we don’t have all of the above, simply to know that the other one is in the next room, you know? Usually when I am alone here with my son it is (when he is in bed) so quiet. My husband came to the kitchen to fix himself some popcorn or asked me to do it because it always tastes better if someone else makes them. The little things matter for sure! I hope he is safe in Congo every single day.

Thinking about: How awesome it is to be able to have a blog and to write my thoughts down and share them with you! I think that my life is different – alone because of all the traveling and projects here and there but this makes it exciting for me. And I found a bit of a routine now to keep up with daily posts. I also have to say that I am literally sitting at my desk every single evening to plan, organize and write. During the day there is still no way of getting anything done with my son being all over the keyboard.

Thank you for reading my blog.