To My Mother

Hello!

I literally did not know what to write and talk about tonight. Call it writers-block, or simply that I am here in Germany and don’t want to sit somewhere and type along alone while my beloved family sits somewhere else and I could rather spend time with them. I am at my home-base here and now. I love it so much. We celebrated “Nikolaus” today with my son and my father dressed up 🙂

This evening we watched my favorite crime series – TATORT. It is so great to be with my parents. There are a lot of emotions involved and I am just happy to be back. This will be a post I meant to write for a long time; however, it seems right to do so now.  My siblings might have the same opinion here or maybe not. I just want to write this post based on my experiences only. When I grew up, my father was at work usually until 6-7 pm so as it mostly is, the mothers are at home taking care of the kids. And so did my mom and she did a great job. I will write a separate post on my dad and why it is awesome to have a father like him.

Growing up, I was so happy to have a mom just the was she is. How she made breakfast for me in the morning before I went to school. The bread (mostly homemade) with cheese and some cut-up veggies (mostly apples or paprika) and of course the water bottle filled with water in the summer and  hot tea that kept my hands warm while waiting for the bus or train in the winter. Some people cannot understand or would not know what is so great about that but it is special to me. The little things, you know. I have so many great memories of my mom and how she dealt with me while I was a kid. The way she introduced me to the local public library or when she took me shopping to this big supermarket in Coburg. How she took care of me when I was sick and needed a hot tea, medicine or just some hugs to feel better. Or help with homework (one bag of sugar are 1000 g which is 1 kg!) and learning about avalanches and biology. She was there for me – she helped me out, she clarified and explained. There are just so many vivid memories of moments in my childhood spent with my mom that I could go on and on. I remember how the coffee smelled when we used to go camping in summer and how she fixed breakfast for all of us. How she made every holiday special by decorating and giving me this warm feeling that I am at home and loved. (well, she still does!) I also do remember the times when I did disappoint her. When I made her feel sad, when she cried because of me and she still loved me unconditionally throughout my bad behavior. Most memories are happy memories however. There were many times  in my puberty when I though I never want to be like my mother or like my parents. And that I will do everything differently when I grow up.

And now? Since I am grown-up and have a child of my own, how did things change? Well, I find myself copying my mom a lot which is great and this works for me. I am appreciating the little things and love to cook and broaden my horizon by reading, learning and studying. I am not my mom but I think that a lot she does makes total sense to me and is amazing. I love that she is open to learn and explore so much. I am looking up to her as a mother and more like a friend and love to be around her. I understand more clearly now why she made certain choices in her life as well and why family is so important. Also not giving up right away is important,  patience and to see beauty in the little things at all times.

When Tatort was finished I took my computer and went to the kitchen (my office at home)  to think about something good to write about. I watched some videos and researched some things online and my mom came in. She just wanted to get a glass of water, prepare her breakfast and say good night. She also said that she really missed me while I was gone for the past five months. That she loves me and loved talking to me in person and seeing my son when she came back from work. Then, out of a sudden it became all clear.  I knew what I will write about tonight. Her!

Below is the link to the Love Theme of my mom and I’s favorite move “Bridges of Madison Country” if you would like to see. I love you so much Mama! I could not be more proud to be your daughter and to have so many good qualities because of you.

Thank you for reading my blog.