.SOMETIMES RAW.

Hello and Happy Monday! 

“Row row row your boat, gently down the stream. Merrily merrily merrily merrily life is but a dream.”

Today was just a somewhat gloomy day. I did not sleep well, it rained and was dark out all morning and I simply felt like meh! Of course the lunch that I tried to cook did not turn out too well and this little line of negativity dragged somewhat through the entire day. What can help? Mostly to talk to my husband but today I needed to be alone for a while, grab a book and head to the next café to do what I really love. Drink coffee, think, write and read. While I felt sad, writing down some notes, I thought about my husband. He is usually really good at feeling happy, being positive and giving me this little smile that I love and makes me forget how bad the day was so far. 

While I sat in this little café today I thought about marriage and relationships. When do you know that he/she is actually the one?  Is it a feeling or a special moment? I will tell you what it is for me and what works for us.  First, I can do all scenarios above in the cartoon and he won’t lose it and pack his things and leave me. We love to laugh and he thinks I am funny. Yeah, I can be pretty funny. We love to talk to each other. He let’s me bitch to a certain extend (almost unbearable extend!) and did not leave me yet. To get married was the best choice because we simply knew it would be great to be together (officially with a piece of paper telling us that we are). We also know that we can do  and achieve whatever we want together. Through him I learned to adapt to anything quicker. (“Basically from 0 to 5000”) We are comfortable together. Months and years later we reached that slightly less exciting stage when we are both more comfortable than ever with each other. Peeing while he is in the bathroom is okay. (Nothing more though, hah!) We can be silly, confusing, sweet and so much more together. We know how to fight and if I forget one or two rules he reminds me. 

We became a team and mostly pull on the same string. Nobody is ever 100% perfect, right (Besides him, mmhm)?! Together we make everything better. The sun will shine even though there are clouds. Sometimes it feels like being with him is a short vacation from reality. We can talk without a period at the end of the sentence. Especially about movies, projects and books. We love sushi. Yay, sushi!  He has many great ideas and we make plans together for the future. (“We? We?”)  We don’t want to imagine life without each other. For him, love is action; for me emotion. We both appreciate the small things we do for each other. My husband has this ability to make me laugh when I need it the most. He just knows somehow. We can laugh so easily. When we have each other, everything feels okay. I am usually just the one freaking out once in a while – he stays calm. Basically, as soon as I met him my life felt better. I found myself prettier, smarter and he just gave me this feeling that everything is “normal”. No problem or condition from the beginning. (He says: “We did everything in order because it was important for me to not mess it up”) We bring out the best of each other. He believes in me and I believe in him. Usually, I am constantly worrying about everything. With him it has gotten so much better. There is just this overwhelming sense that “everything will be okay in the end. And if it is not okay, it is not the end”. (He says: “It is not the end because there is always a solution or a Plan B”)

Does my husband ever annoy me? Do I ever annoy him? Hell, yes! Annoying things my husband does: Usually goes to bed later than I and wakes me up every single time. Snores. Takes his time and is never in a rush (well, he is French!) Annoying things I do: Being German. Thinking about saving money too much.”You talk sometimes like we live under the bridge like Oliver Twist”. That fact that I cannot keep in mind that we are all humans and everything is always so dramatic.  Temper. Punctuality.  Drama Queen. Emotional. My husband says he has a list that he will not take out at this point. 

Over the years you will figure out what annoys you about the other person. You do live with him/her so it is inevitable. It does not matter who you date, eventually, they will make you crazy sometimes. Annoyances aren’t a killer for us and it is worth being together because we just make it work. With one person working slightly more than the other. 

Are you currently in a relationship? Do you know your partner is the right person or do you have doubts? I would love to hear from you. And so does my husband. 

Thank you for reading my blog. 

Hello and Happy Friday! 

I love Berlin. I honestly can say that my favorite part so far is Friedrichshain where a friend of mine lives. She recommended to check out this area but sadly she was working out of town and could not meet us. Well, this means we have to come back here one way or the other. We did have some sunshine but mostly cloudy and grey which does not really matter when walking around in the heart of Berlin. Graffiti makes everything looks colorful and special. Even the oldest run-down buildings. Berlin is full of art everywhere. Street art, great museums, contemporary art, stickers all over the place and hipsters. My world! I felt totally comfortable and could have walked around even more to discover and explore this great city. Read on and find out what we have been up to this week. 

Reading: While on vacation I read more than usual. Just traveling by car makes this happen. My husband loves to drive! Whoop Whoop – and I can read! I know, at this point I should really see a shrink and tell him about this book addiction of mine. I finished Jocelyne Saucier’s Ein Leben mehr. This is a book my husband and I read at the same time; he read it in French and I thought it was great. It is fun to talk about the book afterwards and analyze together. I read Matt Haig’s Reasons to Stay Alive which was awesome. Book reviews will follow obviously, hah! We discovered a great bookstore here in Berlin and I was a victim again. Damn you, books! 

Watching: My husband and I watched The Intern two days ago and I highly recommend it. It is a beautiful little story and a great watch. We both loved it. I did watch some documentaries on Checkpoint Charlie and The Wall on Youtube and realized that I should have taken more notes in History class in school. Well, it is never too late, right. 

Enjoying: Myself and traveling with my family. Family is simply the best. We had a great time. Let’s see where we go next. A bunch of awesome trips are in the making. I also enjoy just to be these days. I am content and happy. Life is good. 

Discovering: Wherever I go, I usually I go to the local independent bookstores. Of course I found a couple in Berlin and the one that sounded instantly awesome was Shakespeare and Sons. What a gem of a bookstore. They offer a wide selection of English and French books from every genre, new or old. I comfortably browsed through the bookshelves. There are some tables and chairs to sit and read or to enjoy a cup of coffee and a bagel or brownie from Fine Bagels which is located in the bookstore. My husband “allowed me” to spend 30 minutes in this awesome bookstore. He knows me too well. He waited outside with his daughter and our son. I was happy with all my purchases (not too bad for 30 minutes, right!?) and we all shared the world’s best brownie I have ever had and bought from Fine Bagels to make everybody more comfortable and happy. They were waiting for me outside in the cold while I sipped my coffee inside. However, this was happiness for me – to be in a bookstore, alone.  I don’t need anything else.  Raum B is another independent bookstore that we discovered. I do like the concept of this place being a workshop and a bookstore with a little coffee corner. Simple and great. Just a perfect place to meet friends, talk and hang out. 

Thinking about: Always more traveling. I am totally hooked again. Thailand is on my bucket list since so many friends went there recently. It is almost like a sign. “Daniela, you need to go there!” I also know that I won’t ever go to Eisenhüttenstadt again. What the hell is this city all about? I felt depressed, sad and just weird. Have you ever seen House of Wax? This is how it kind of feels when you are in this city. Watch this funny video with Tom Hanks about Eisenhüttenstadt and driving on the German Autobahn. So funny but true! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRgzr3gc7Ys

What have you been up to this week? Have you ever been to Eisenhüttenstadt? What have you read or watched? I would love to hear from you. 

Thank you for reading my blog and have a great weekend. 

Hello!

February 14th is around the corner. You know what this means, right? Going all crazy to find something for your sweetheart for Valentine’s Day. Usually my Valentine’s Day plans are somewhat like this: If my husband and I are lucky to be together at this day we usually stay in, bring our son to bed, make some food together, drink wine and either read or watch a movie. One year he also got me chocolates or a cheesecake and roses. Or he sent roses and chocolate which was sweet but honestly, I didn’t even know it was Valentin’s Day until the box of chocolates arrived with the FedEx delivery.  My opinion on Valentine’s Day is that it is a day just like every other day even though this day is named after a Christian martyr and dates back to the 5th century. Isn’t it more like a calendar -filler, like Halloween? Like you have the feeling you have to do something because the calendar and society tells you to?

All over the stores you can see hearts almost as soon as Christmas is over. To me this day is just pointless and invented by some chocolate, wine, lingerie, jewelry or flower company to just make profit and make people spend more money on stuff. Usually, single people feel depressed and miserable that day because they get reminded at every single corner that today is the day you are supposed to receive something love-special from your significant other. Isn’t it something like Single’s Awareness Day? This should be a “hol(y)iday in the United States, don’t you think? As you might have figured out by now, I don’t like Valentine’s Day too much. This has nothing to do with me being a depressed housewife desperately waiting for my husband to come home with flowers and chocolates and be severely disappointed if he forgets Valentine’s Day and then I don’t talk to him for a week (or two). I just don’t care about it much. You see, I think that if we need a day to remind us that we have to buy something or do something special for our partners on that particular day, something is wrong. My husband and I try to celebrate Valentine’s Day every day. Sweet idea, no? Of course this does not happen every day but we give it a try and make this marriage work and something special. Just one single gesture, just one tiny kiss, just respect each other and show the other one that we care. 

I do have a lot of love inside my little heart that I am happy to share with my family and friends and others. I just think that action speaks louder than any material gifts really. If my husband and I cook together (we make our famous onion soup) it is magical for me. Working together on something and then eating together is so awesome. We also love to go to a fancy restaurant. I mean we live(d) in New York – we have done it all. But I think it is important to keep in mind that we don’t do anything special on Valentines Day that we would not do any other day, you know. 

Little actions that speak louder than any gift is my goal in my marriage. The other day, my husband and I unknowingly picked up the same book. He bought it in French and I (several days later)  in German and it is the best to read together. I finished mine today and while I type this he is reading and finishing his. I cannot wait to talk about this amazing book to him. This is romance and love to me. To randomly pick up the same book because you are invested in the same topic. The little things. 

What is your take on Valentine’s Day? Do you like it? Do you do something special and if yes, what? I would love to hear from you. Share your thoughts the comments. 

Thank you for reading my blog.