Hello!
If you have seen the movie Inside Out you know who is depicted in the picture above. Sadness! Sometimes I do think the world is a sad place. What is going on with the food, water, fracking, pollution and such. At some point, I just don’t know what to believe anymore. Is it good to eat organic? Or is it all poisoned as well? Is it okay to grow your own veggies or is the soil polluted to the point that I would be better off eating at a fast food chain? While all this is on my mind I think what values I teach my son. The values that I have and try to live by and at the same time raising my son in this world we are living in is tough sometimes. Some days I think about these things more, sometimes less; however, the thoughts are always present somewhere in my head. I always have been an emotional person, but since I became a mom it transformed into this stage of insanity. Even more emotions and more thinking. It is insane. Can’t anybody tell one all these things before having a child? Isn’t it hard enough already to be a woman? 🙂
Recently I received some Pixi Books from my favorite bookstore in Coburg – Riemann. I read to my son every single night, no matter what. Reading these Pixi-books to him – about this world of happiness and no problems makes me feel good. I am looking forward to all the changes that are about to happen, all the adventures my son will experience and enjoy. We always change. Change is present and around us at all times. We will move, travel, kindergarten, school, university or some other major milestones are around the corner. These are all big shifts in our little lives and it is okay but weird at the same time. I think about summer of 2015 which seemed it was just last month. We spent time at the beach as a family, I was glad to enjoy the entire spring and beginning of summer with my parents and see my son enjoy my parent’s garden. So let’s see what 2016 brings. This year is almost over which makes me emotional every time. This change, change in weather, temperature and season get me every time. I need sun, and if there is none I get miserable. Yep, no sun here in Coburg for several days now. Vitamins D intake: increased!
But usually, change is good. I am not a person to like routine too much. I feel bored easily. This being said, I am looking forward to change. To something new and excited and see where it all leads us; my family and I. So, here we are. The last couple of days in December. As I always say, how did this all happen? And why so fast? To look outside and see how things have changed since July when I have last been here it feels so strange in a way. The leaves are mostly gone, or brown. Life goes on. Things change. I look at my son and he looks so big and so grown-up out of a sudden. Didn’t I just carry him around all over the place and was tired of it and thought how nice it would be if he would already be able to walk? And now he runs and I can barely catch him. He is not a baby anymore. He talks, has his occasional tantrums (not bad, thankfully!) and a mind of his own. It is just so exciting. I am so happy that I am able to connect with my family here in Germany. Especially this time of the year. To see them all, my grandparents, uncle, aunt and family. My family is pretty small, so I treasure them even more.
For the rest of the month I wish time would slow down a bit. I will think a bit harder about how I end up spending my time and with whom. There is literally no time to waste. What will happen in 2016? Will we be able to grow our family? Who knows and I don’t really push for anything. Whatever will happen will happen. I am glad to be in the here and now and I will focus only on this and at the present moment. I am thankful for what I have and looking forward to new opportunities and adventures while wiping away this tiny tear at the corner of my eye.
Thank you for reading my blog.
