I believe there are two kinds of people: Alive people and Not Alive people. Alive people are engaged in the act of living, attuned to others, present in the moment, and “a little bit shiny”. Not alive people, on the other hand, exhibit and almost spiritual dullness. They are dampened, muted, and view life at a distance.
I am an alive person who turns 44-years old tomorrow. Wow! Happy birthday to me. This year has been an amazing one so far with lots of changes, adventures and even more crazy stuff coming up, like a huge trip to Japan this month.
Today, I want to share a couple of birthday and life-notes that are helpful to me and make life easier. Because I am a visual thinker, it helps me to take notes and refer to them often. I take notes all the time and everywhere. I want to share my notes that I wrote down in my little Moleskine notebook and that are daily reminders that life is awesome no matter what it throws at me. Do not take my notes to be literal, all-encompassing, or fitting in every context. This is just what works for me.
And always remember: There are lots of lavender bushes out there, waiting patiently to be sniffed.
- If you don’t know what someone’s talking about, ASK.
- Articulate what you love about the ones you love.
- Empathise with caution, practice compassion with abandon.
- Go for a walk. Don’t bring your phone.
- Know that terrible and wonderful things will befall you, regardless of your anxiety and yearning.
- Captivate your audience. Dazzle them with your wit, grace, and humour.
- Think about what you will miss most when you are dead. Do more of that.
- One possible solution to an urgent problem is to go to bed and deal with it in the morning.
- I am plenty. I have plenty. Say it out loud!
- Dispense advice if it is asked for. Otherwise, dispense love.
- Think about how proud your past self would be if they could see you now.
- Think about death enough to appreciate life, but not so much that it eclipses life.
- Let other people be other people.
- Write down things you observe, dreams, or things you say in conversations. Sometimes making art is just paying attention.
- Travel far distances to see old friends.
- You will never need or use all of the knives in a knife-set.
- Talk to yourself sweetly, like you would speak to a scared child. Issue forgiveness gently and easily.
- There are many kinds of beauty and your kind is one of them.
- Look up. What do you see? What do you hear, smell, feel? Isn’t it fun to be alive?
- Make new friends: through other friends, through common interests, on the street, on the internet, through one person being brave, no matter how many friends you have, no matter how old you are.
- If you find yourself obsessing about everything you don’t have, give something away to someone who needs it more.
- When something is good, enjoy it.
- Consider that you might be wrong and correct course.
- When people ask you how you are, tell them how you really are. So they will tell you how they really are, unless you don’t care how they really are, in which case it is fine to say “fine”.
- You don’t need a good voice to sing.
- Let the people you love the most tell the stories they love to tell, even if you have heard them before. For everyone else, politely stop them mid-sentence.
- Your partner should get you through the hard times. Your partner shouldn’t BE the hard times.
- Eat! Enjoy food!
- Take pride in being the least frustrated person at the airport, in traffic, waiting in line….
- Listen to yourself when you talk.
- When complaining, consider why. Is it because you actually want something to change? Or just want support and affirmation? Or simply love to complain?
- You might die soon, or they might die. Or we all might. Make peace and hold each other close and never leave someone in anger and fighting without saying sorry.
- If you have portraits of yourself up allover your house, people are going to think you are conceited. Replace them with portraits of me.
- Be happy. Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system. Do things that make you feel good and proud.
- Help people. Help someone. Show someone you care. Say something nice. Smile. Make eye contact. Hug. Kiss. Laugh. Laugh as much as you can.
- Find out who you are. Okay, this is a big one (that what she said!) but possible.
I don’t mean to tell you what to do or how to live your lives, but those are some of the things that have worked for me. And I believe with all my heart that even if we try the teeniest tiniest bit we can make this world a much happier and healthier one. And if we try even harder, we can do some pretty spectacular things.
Oh, one more thing talking about spectacular: My eight book “The Average of All Possible Things” will be published this year. What an awesome birthday gift to me indeed. So, once again: Happy Birthday to Me.
