Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever decluttered your house and donated, sold, or thrown out a bunch of things?
OK, sure, sex is cool, but have you ever successfully kept up with your expenses in real-time for a full calendar year so you can make a big purchase of something you always wanted?
Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever had chocolate cake in the morning for breakfast?
So, sex is great but has your partner ever sneaked up behind you and just kissed you on your neck?
So there’s sex. But there’s also your child’s school not assuming you are the default on-call parent because of your gender, and instead contacting your male partner first to pick up your sick child in the middle of the day.
Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever framed a print you’ve owned for five years and actually hung it on the wall? Because that is truly orgasmic.
Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever had a bookshelf wall full of books?
Ooo yeah, sex is very cool, but even hotter is if you click “unsubscribe” from dumb newsletters and put your phone and computer in “sleep mode” at 2100 hours.
Yeah, sex, blah blah blah, but have you watched Stephen King’s IT with popcorn on the couch yet???
Sex is a thing that is good. But have you ever seen Human Resources take a documented pattern of harassment seriously and fire someone immediately with no retaliation against the people who filed the complaints? Because that, wow, is also very, very good.
I am a big proponent of sex, BUT… have you ever been invited to an event you didn’t want to attend and just said “no” without making up a convoluted excuse and had the other person accept your personal boundary right away?
There’s sex, then there’s the all-over tingling sensation you get from deciding not to read the article that is infuriating everyone on the internet.
Sex can definitely be satisfying, but is it as consistently satisfying as listening to the rain while being inside with a good book, a cup of hot chocolate, and a foot massage?
Sex is cool but have you ever turned to a teenager in a movie theater who has started looking at their phone twenty minutes into the first act, calmly hissed, “Put that away right now” and had them obey you immediately?
You could have sex, or you could just recycle your entire stack of unread magazines and papers all at once without an ounce of guilt. You will feel the same release.
Sex is cool and you should do it… but I would also recommend the experience of hearing the voice of your therapist in your head as you’re about to make the exact same mistake you’ve made numerous times in the past but then CHOOSING NOT TO DO IT because you’ve grown as a person and you’re doing the work.
There’s kinky sex, and then there’s the thrill of deliberately using a coaster on a table belonging to someone you hate.
OK, I get it—sex is cool, but have you ever asked three senior professional coworkers what their salaries are, had them tell you openly in the spirit of helping, and then gone to your next performance review armed to negotiate with that very helpful information?
Sex is without a doubt very cool. Also cool? Liking and feeling good about your current haircut.
Yes, sure, sex is cool, about as cool as not drinking alcohol at night and then sleeping eight hours straight and somewhere in there having a wild, wild sex dream about Falkor, the luck dragon, from The Neverending Story cause you’re so deep in that sweet REM, baby.
Sex? Cool. Wearing flats to a black-tie wedding because your feet hurt and honestly you think you might be over-wearing heels? Even cooler.
Yeah, sex is cool but have you ever told someone you didn’t really want to hang out with that you had a doctor’s appointment, implied it was somewhat serious, and then spent the better part of an afternoon wandering around in the woods looking at trees enjoying the silcence?