. We Will Never Meet in Real Life- A Screenplay in 3 Scenes.

Charming, hot Chris. I have a colleague who looks just like him. I think he is from Scotland šŸ˜‰

Do you know the actor Chris Hemsworth? I don’t know if you have heard but Chris Hemsworth is starring in his latest movie “Tyler Rake: Extraction 2 which was filmed in Vienna, Austria. They filmed right next to UNO city and I could hear explosions, helicopters flying all over the place and gunshots. I told my friend at work, “I really think he is good-looking. I wonder how it would be if I would be married to him.” My friend responded, “How do you think it is? Amazing. He is super rich and has everything you will ever need.” All this commotion triggered the idea to write my own screenplay.

(At the United Nations International Center – Visitors Entrance)

Scene 1

Chris Hemsworth is walking up the stairs to Gate 1 at the United Nations International Center after he successfully landed his helicopter on the helicopter landing pad. He just finished his last scene before he quickly flew over to pick me up. I am at work when he walks up the stairs. He then asked me to remove my belt with weapon and radio and take his hand. While I grabbed his hand he says, “Darling, you don’t need to do this anymore. Enough of this. Come with me. I only love you and already got divorced yesterday!”

So I grab his hand and walk with him. My son is already in the helicopter because Chris already picked him up (it is my movie, okay?). Staff members clap while I wave my colleagues goodbye. “I will never return to this place”, I say while I step into the helicopter. We fly toward the sunset (squishy music playing in the background) while he tells me over and over how much he loves me.

Then, we land in Australia where we start our life together. Again, I am the director of this movie and his helicopter can easily fly to Australia. Okay, his three kids will be over every second weekend but hey….. that’s fine, I guess. We move into his OUR mansion and I try to get used to being super rich by strolling around in the mansion while I overheard this conversation.

Scene 2Downstairs in the Servant Dungeon

HOUSEHOLD SERVANT: Iā€™m worried about Mrs Hemsworth. (that’s me now)

OTHER HOUSEHOLD SERVANT: Donā€™t be. Sheā€™s rich, ain’t she?

BUTLER: Stop arguing, you two! Someone needs to take this lobster up to the dining room!

HOUSEHOLDĀ SERVANT: Sigh! (Takes platter and exits up the stairs) Iā€™m still worried about Daniela.

BUTLER: Didnā€™t she always want this kind of life? I don’t know her too well but I think she really loves him.

OTHERĀ HOUSEHOLDĀ SERVANT: I know she loves simple things. She just wanted to be happy with Chris but this is all too much for her. The jewels are too heavy. She can barely walk straight anymore with this crown and diamonds on her head.

BUTLER: I think so, too. She will leave him. It is just a matter of time. She needs a little more in life than this. Oh, well, would one of you take this rare turtle soup with shellacked truffles up to the dining room? Do not make eye contact with anyone, including the turtle!

OTHER HOUSEHOLD SERVANT: Humph! (exits to the kitchen)

HOUSEHOLDĀ SERVANT: Sigh! (exits to the stairs, carrying turtle soup, eyes closed) Oh, I think I see Queen Daniela.

OTHER HOUSEHOLD SERVANT: Well, go on. Say hello! She looks sad.

Me: This is all too much for me. You guys have to help me. I need to leave Chris. This way of life is not for me.

BUTLER: (nods once, approvingly)

All Servants: We will help you. Go talk to him first. We will start packing your things.

Scene 3Final Conversation with Chris

Chris: Do you like the new cars I bought for you? Let’s fly to the Bahamas. We will take our plane.

Me: Chris, I think you are amazing and I was joking with my friends that I wish to be married and live with you but I cannot stand this kind of life. I don’t care about all your money and all the things you buy for me. My question to you is: What do you really need? How much do you really need to possess? Don’t all these materialistic things end up running your life? I can even go so far in saying that the things you consume end up consuming you. Chris, the best stuff in life isnā€™t stuff at all. The best things in life are free. (squishy music playing in the back). I know that your endless consumption will result in increased unhappiness. This is why I have to leave you. Goodbye, Chris. (dramatically touching forehead and wiping away a couple of tears) Farewell, my love. Goodbye.

Chris: Daniela, you have a good point. I mean, I am so rich, I could just stop making movies and commercials and all these things that increase my income to another couple of billion dollars this month. I am actually so rich that I can comfortably live my life, eat the most expensive food, wear the most expensive clothes and buy ….. (you get my point, I am super rich!) and never make another movie again. WHY am I getting so much money in the first place? I mean, I am just studying a script and rehearsing it. This is not real work anyway. The Polish construction workers who fix my mansion and build another mansion on top of my mansion, these guys work really hard. Long story short, I made a decision. I will give all my money to you and your son. You enlightened me and I will always love you. I will transfer all my money to you right away.

(Daniela and her son didn’t hear the money transfer part because they already walked away slowly not knowing that she already has ten hundred billion dollars in her Bank Austria account)

.The End. (curtain falls)

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