.Password Invalid – A Conversation with my Computer.

I started all over again in a new city; in a new country. This also entails changing phone numbers, bank account, passwords and whatnot which is always very annoying. The other day, I tried to sign up with a government website in Vienna. This is what happened:

Thank you for creating your new online account! We are pleased you are with us. Please choose a password.

Password: lovemyson

Error: Password must contain at least nine alphanumeric characters, including one number

Password: Ilovemyson2

Error: Password must contain at least one hard-to-guess number

Password: Ilovemyson9

Error: Password already exists

Password: Ilovemyson88

Error: Number is inappropriate. [why not?, Ooooooh, 88, HH…. I am in Vienna]

Password: mysonmybestfriend1

Error: Password must be less sad

Password: mysonisagoodfriend1

Error: Capital letters required throughout password

Password: MySonIsaGoodFriend1

Error: Password must contain two numbers

Password: MySonIsaGoodFriend12

Error: Password is easy to guess

Password: IReallylikeSomeoneElseToo12

Error: Sounds great but maybe this is an unattainable fantasy if he does not know it

Password: ItoldhimandhefeelstheSameWay2

Error: Be careful and take things slow. You just got out of a huge mess! [ I guess the internetknows everything!?]

Password: HowCanItaketheRelationshipToTheNextLevel?!12

Error: Did he meet your parents? Did you meet his parents? Does your son like him?

Password: Hedidandtheylikehim!Mysonloveshimtoohecanlifthimupsidedown!12

Error: Enjoy time together. Here and Now.

Password: CanIUsethisasAPassword?12

Error: No. I want to know more about this new guy.

Password: JsusChrst666

Error: Password cannot take the Lord’s name in vain.

Password: ButIamanAtheist777

Error: That makes it worse!

Password: iH8You69

Error: Let’s not take this down that road

Password: HeIsSmartandHandsomeAndLetsMeBeMyselfHeAlsoMakesMeLaugh

Error: Does he give you a break from parenting?

Password: HeDoesanditFeelsGreatMySonActuallySaysThaTHeLovesHim<3

Error: Your son does not have a father figure in his life?

Password: HisFatherNeverCallsButHeLovesMyFriendWhoTalksandListensToHimMySonActuallyHoldsHisHand12!

Error: Why does his father act like this?

Password: IDoNotKnow!HeChoosesToBeThisWay!MaybeHeIsTooAfraidofWhatMayHappenIfheTalksToHisSonAndHowHeWould React

Error: That seems not very smart. Does his son miss him?

Password: HisSonHasEverythingHeNeedsAndDoesNotMissHimButAsksWhyHisFatherNeverCallsAndIfHisFatherLovesHim!IQ164

Error: Haha! Funny. Next you probably tell me that he tried to kill 15 people with his bare hands?

Password: HeActuallyToldMeThatStoryOnNovember1st2018ButThereIsNoEvidenceHowever!FilesHaveBeenDeletedHeSaid12?

Error: Oh wow. This is crazy. Is he at least paying child support?

Password: NopeHeIsNotButHeComesUpWithGreatExcuses!

Error: Wow. Why wouldn’t he pay for his own son and be responsible? When was the last time he saw/spoke to him? Also, I saw on LinkedIn that you currently don’t have a job.

Password: HeChoosesNotToPayHeSawHimLastinMay2018AndHasNotSpokenToHimSince!YesIdoNotHaveAJobYetButWillHaveOneInJanuary2020IDoNotHaveAnIncomeUntilThen12!

Error: Wow! What father does that? How do your son and you survive financially?

Password: IDoNotKnowWhyHeDoesIt!WeSurviveOnMyPensionAndHelpFromFamilyandFriends 12!

Error: Wow. I, as a Computer, am shocked and I am not supposed to have feelings. I have nothing to add at this point. You can choose any password you would like.

Password: JustPaytheChildSupportYouOweYourSon1!

Congratulations! Your password is set!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.