{"id":6157,"date":"2023-06-16T04:49:09","date_gmt":"2023-06-16T04:49:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/?p=6157"},"modified":"2023-06-16T04:49:15","modified_gmt":"2023-06-16T04:49:15","slug":"dog-versus-doctor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/?p=6157","title":{"rendered":".Dog versus Doctor."},"content":{"rendered":"
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Your dog takes a highly individualized approach to your care. Instead of saying your Vitamin D is low and suggesting you get more sun, your dog takes you on three walks a day. If you have insomnia, they\u2019ll lay on your stomach and stare into your soul until you fall asleep every night for the next fifteen years. If you\u2019re anemic, they\u2019ll murder a squirrel and leave it under your pillow. Would Dr. L. do that? Didn\u2019t think so.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Forget long wait times and running between offices to see specialists. Your dog only makes house calls. And they are available 24-7. If you have a high fever in the middle of the night, your dog will check your vitals every thirty minutes from the most scientifically advanced medical facility: under the couch.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ask your doctor if they want to go to the park with you, and they\u2019ll up your antidepressants and refer you to a therapist. Ask your dog, and they\u2019ll spin around in circles and run to the door, no questions asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When your dog is your doctor, you\u2019ll never go to the emergency room for a debilitating migraine and get sent home with two Aspirin and a huge bill. There are no unexpected costs because your dog doesn\u2019t know what money is. Or bills. Instead of cash or card, they accept TreatPay, a simple behaviour-based exchange. You choose what you pay based on the quality of care and if they\u2019ve been a good boy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rather than spending hours on the phone begging your insurance to cover life-saving care, your dog begs you to let him cover all treatment at 100 percent. Your dog is so opposed to private insurance he chewed and swallowed your insurance card, and you had to spend eight hundred euros to get his stomach pumped. That\u2019s how committed your dog is to your health care.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your doctor is always overbooked, but your dog has no other patients and no concept of time. They will never make you feel like a hypochondriac for scheduling a follow-up every time you have a stomachache. Has your gastroenterologist ever been so excited to see you that they peed on the floor? Probably not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your doctor needed eight years of school and a stethoscope to hear your irregular heartbeat. Your 20 kilo medical prodigy, doggie, hasn\u2019t even graduated from PetSmart Puppy School, and they can detect your panic attack from the next room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most doctors only help you after you\u2019re sick or injured, but your dog\u2019s preventative care is more proactive. They nose out all health hazards, such as garbage trucks, the wind, metal sidewalk grates, and old ladies with shopping baskets on wheels. When was the last time your orthopedic surgeon dragged you half a block to avoid a collision with a kid on an electric scooter?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your doctor doesn\u2019t call you every so often to check-in. Your dog runs over to your desk every hour to see how work is going and lower your blood pressure by letting you scratch their neck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your dog will never minimize your symptoms or suggest it\u2019s \u201call in your head.\u201d When you cry out in pain, they howl back in sympathy. When you sneeze, they bark until the neighbors call the police.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your dog loves you unconditionally for their entire life. They\u2019ll follow you to the other side of your apartment and back just to rest their little head on your feet. When you\u2019re sad, they roll over on their back and look at you upside-down like, \u201cI\u2019ll take my belly rub now,\u201d because they know it makes you laugh. They are your family. Your doctor calls you Pamela even though your name is Daniela.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The only thing your dog can\u2019t do to improve your health is prepare your taxes. For that, you\u2019ll need a cat.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your dog takes a highly individualized approach to your care. Instead of saying your Vitamin D is low and suggesting you get more sun, your dog takes you on three walks a day. If you have insomnia, they\u2019ll lay on your stomach and stare into…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_ml_titleColor":"#000000","_ml_titleFont":"Roboto","_ml_titleFontSize":1.136,"_ml_titleFontWeight":"400","_ml_titleLineHeight":1.3,"_ml_metaColor":"#708090","_ml_metaFont":"Montserrat","_ml_metaFontSize":0.6785,"_ml_metaFontWeight":"400","_ml_metaLineHeight":0.92,"_ml_bodyColor":"#a9a9a9","_ml_bodyFont":"Open Sans","_ml_bodyFontSize":0.85,"_ml_bodyFontWeight":"400","_ml_bodyLineHeight":1.2,"_ml_wooPriceColor":"#666","_ml_wooPriceFont":"Open Sans","_ml_wooPriceFontSize":0.9,"_ml_wooPriceFontWeight":"400","_ml_wooPriceLineHeight":1.27,"_ml_headingColor":"#000","_ml_headingFont":"Merriweather","_ml_headingFontSize":2.02,"_ml_headingFontWeight":"700","_ml_headingLineHeight":1.47,"_mlglobal_userfontcolors":{"headingColorUser":[],"titleColorUser":[],"metaColorUser":[],"bodyColorUser":[],"wooPriceColorUser":[]},"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-minimalism-lifestyle"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6157","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6157"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6157\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6157"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6157"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sometimesraw.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6157"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}