.My Stages of Insomnia.

via The New York Times

I usually sleep pretty well but there are just some of those weird nights. Cannot sleep? Find out what I do when counting sheep just does not cut it.

1. Waiting

2. Pondering

3. Recollection of recent mistakes

4. Neighborhood Watch. Across, there is a teenage music student who is very sweet, a couple who seem to fight about every single thing on this planet, and an elderly couple who watch Sissi movies and have breakfasts half-naked every Saturday and Sunday.

5. Annoyance

6. Realisation that this could last awhile

7. Brainstorming

8. Taking notes

9. Disgust

10. Wait, Is It Lying or Laying?

11. Itching

12. Anticipation of tomorrow’s mistakes and extreme tiredness

13. Pillow and blanket adjustment

14. Inventory of personal faults and mistakes

15. Tossing

16. Turning

17. Anger

18. Evaluation of prior caffeine intake

19. Meme remembrance

20. Controlled deep breathing

21. Turning to find the ultimate sleeping position

22. Another cup of tea

23. Corona-Anxiety (the new normal)

24. Debate with nemesis (Win)

25. Hydration

26. Bargaining

27. Wondering what acquaintances I never, ever think of during the day are up to

28. Masturbation

29. Denial

30. Reading

31. Debate with nemesis (Loss)

32. Toilet

33. Awareness of skull inside face

34. Conception of next major creative work

35. Imagined stardom

36. Writing this article

37. Acceptance while considering chocolate

38. Turn CALM App back on

39. Wait, is this a dream?

40. More anxiety

41. Clock avoidance

42. Considering to buy a white noise machine

43. Acceptance. Again.

44. Sex with nemesis (Tie)

45. Searching for sleep aid (Unsuccessful)

46. Maybe a disease?

47. WebMD Search and Dr. Google

48. Self-Pity

49. Should I just get up?

50. Mild Hallucinations

51. Listening to noises outside

52. Alarm

53. Thinking about last night’s discussion, get up, smile nevertheless and go to work.

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