Recently a friend of mine responded to my post on “Happiness”. Part of it was that she thinks it is not that easy to just pack up and go. Well let’s put it this way, there is a lot to be said when someone plans a change of scenery or even a move across the world.
Thinking when I made the decision to leave Germany behind almost eleven years ago and start a new life in the U.S. many of my friends said that I am just nuts. To leave a well-paid, secure job and just go into the “unknown” seems crazy. But I simply needed a change – needed a new challenge. And for me the grass is sometimes indeed greener somewhere else (on the other side) but there is just a great amount of truth in wherever you go, there you are. Home is where my heart is. For me back then it was very easy. I was single, no kid, no partner, no responsibilities but taking care of myself so I hopped on the plane and that was that. I was not running away from myself. All I wanted was to experience something new. I just did everything in my power to make this move happen because I really wanted it. It made me really happy.
I believe that if I really want something it will work out. If there are any doubts and there are beliefs that this pattern of ones life is okay the way it is then nothing will change. And this is also good. Whatever makes a person happy. But recently I have been hearing all this whining from friends that they would love to do this and that and try out this but they are not sure/afraid. All I am saying is: “Go for it if you really want it!” I have been down this road before. Many times. Even simple things as changing departments/units where I worked. I tend to get comfortable over time. And change comes not so easy anymore. If something does not make me happy anymore, if something does not fulfill me anymore a change is needed. My dream was always to live in the U.S. (well, I came here when I was 23 years old – Sex and the City anyone?).
America is extraordinary country with many beautiful areas. I was fortunate to live in Manhattan, literally 15 walking minutes away from Times Square. Wow! But after a while, I wanted to see the stars again at night looking out of my apartment/cubicle window. I would like to hear nothing but cicadas at night. See a squirrel here and there in my backyard. To enjoy the silence is basically impossible in the city. So guess what? I changed the environment I was living in. Simple as that. Change! Living the way I always had is not enough sometimes. Sometimes just asking myself “Why?” makes all the difference. Why am I not happy? Why do I want a change? This sense of disappointment if nothing changes and things just keep playing out the same way is just not working for me. I am still working on not worrying too much about things (I came a long way from constantly worrying to taking it easier). Even though I have taken this step of moving by myself to the U.S. I was worrying if things will be okay which is normal I think. Worrying about money, you name it. But sometimes I just have to stop. My husband tells me this all the time. There is just nothing one can do in certain situations and worrying does not help. And most importantly all these moments I have already experienced are the only possession that nobody can take away from me.
Sometimes the answers are not easy to get to; however, they are always there but I have to take my time and examine them in enough detail and with care. Even though this is difficult. I believe making long-term changes that create change in life and that count starts just by digging deep and asking the right questions. And yes, I think it is okay to just pack a suitcase, go to the airport and head towards the sun without worrying about anything else. Even with kids. 🙂 So here you have it. This is how I enjoy my life with my family. In life, everything is temporal. The moments I have experienced are the only things I really own. Nothing else! Those are mine to keep and even more importantly to collect more and more. Adventure awaits.
